Thursday, 13 October 2016

Six Changes Post Childbirth

My aunt told me it would take 18 months for my body to heal back to its usual state. At six weeks post partum I thought, 'nah, mine's already healed.' My stitches had dissolved and I'd gone for my first jog. Four months further down the line, I know I was nowhere near done healing - physically nor emotionally - and still got a long way to go. Here's how childbirth has changed me:

- I'm lighter than I was when pregnant but I feel fatter. Whereas before I could just cut out snacking and jog every evening to shed a few pounds, now it takes a lot of scheduling to go just 3 times a week and except my dinner after the baby falls asleep, ALL my meals are snacks.
- I'm more disciplined. If I don't do something when I have the chance, I won't get another opportunity for days. As a result, I've become way more efficient - this is the first time I've written more than 2 blog posts on a blog I've started!
- I'm more selfish. It may be surprising but before I had to care for another human 24/7 I felt quite guilty about spending a little too much on shoes or getting a haircut more than once every five years. Now I know that 'you can't pour from an empty cup' isn't just a new age mantra to sell yoga retreats, it's true.
- I'm more patient. I'm sure my husband will disagree but these days before nagging him about something I ask myself 'is this really non negotiable', and 90% of the time I keep quiet. (That's right Nick, you're only getting 10% of actual complaints!) If we do start arguing, I say I don't want to argue and we move on. This literally never happened before, but now I really do think 'life's too short' - kudos to those of you who didn't need to be responsible for another human to figure that one out!
- I have more energy. Yes - I'm way more exhausted, but I'm also doing 500% more. I never ever feel sluggish now, only happy or exhausted. This might be my favourite change.
- I'm happier. This is what I wanted, it's my vocation fulfilled, and there's no better feeling than doing what you know you want in spite of all your fears and doubts and hesitations. If I can successfully teach Francis one thing in this lifetime I hope it's to have the kind of faith that leads you to do what you know you are meant to do.

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